Thursday, January 13, 2011

Day 11 - Irrational/Distorted/Faulty/Just plain BAD, pt. 2

What did you think of yesterday's post? Did any of those thoughts resonate with you? Again, we all think these kinds of thoughts sometimes. It's normal! Just because the thoughts are bad doesn't mean YOU are! However, if we can prevent some unnecessary anxiety by improving our thought processes, we might as well, right?!

So on to more of those pesky beliefs:

Labeling is when we... well, label someone or something because we're unhappy. For example, a teenage girl wants to stay out late on a date with her boyfriend but her parents say she has to stick to her curfew. She thinks to herself, "My parents are such dictators. I can't stand them."

Feelings are Facts:
Contrary to popular belief we do not have to be controlled by our feelings. Often times we think that because we feel a certain way, it's reality. That is simply not true! Especially for women, this can be a huge struggle sometimes. An example of this is: You're feeling lonely one weekend because you don't have plans and you think to yourself "No one likes me. I must have a terrible personality because I have no friends".

Forecasting is when we predict that things will turn out badly. For example, you go to the doctor to get a biopsy and, before you get the results, think to yourself "it must be cancer."

Judging is when we are critical and often use such words as should, must, have to etc. For example, after writing a blog you think to yourself "I never should have written that. People are gonna stop following me now!" None of us ever do that right?! :)

This is pretty self-explanatory. It's when we blame ourselves for things that are not our responsibility. For example, a woman who is married to an alcoholic might think, "It's all my fault. He wouldn't drink if I was a better wife."

Do any of these types of thinking make you go hmm? Don't stress if you struggle with these! Information is power! Now you know!

What now though? Here is an exercise for you: Write down the 2 you struggle with most on a 3 x 5 card. Tape it to your bathroom mirror to remind yourself not to think like that! You are worth a lot more than your negative self talk leads you to believe! When you find yourself thinking one of those types of thoughts tell yourself "stop" and change your thought around to be something positive.

See you tomorrow!

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the reminder. I have now turned all of my "shoulds" into "coulds"!